New Technology


Anyway, not that I’d used one before, but it seemed obvious enough – at least after you’d shook the lemur off the end of it and set it to vibrate at medium intensity.

Still, though all new technology takes a while to get used to, I suppose, and I am reasonably confident that the Kilt Detector app will come in useful one day, and not only on my very infrequent trips to Scotland. The ability to detect if there is anyone within a 5 mile radius who is wearing a kilt is bound to be nothing but a boon to mankind, if only to increase the awareness of the sporran as an endangered species. That is only to be expected really, as the life-chances of anything are bound to be somewhat precarious when having to eke out an existence that close to a Scotsman’s groin.

Anyway, it has a 32-billion megapixel camera, so those sextexting photographs you have a habit of accidentally sending to your aunt in Cleethorpes, instead of that new girl on Reception, are going to more resemble something like a NASA flypast of some distant planet’s moons rather than give the right romantic piquancy to your candid erotica.

However, I suppose that is the price we all must pay for technological progress.

Published by David Hadley

A Bloke. Occasionally points at ducks.

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