Soupdragon Tailspin


Soupdragon Tailspin is probably the UK’s leading exponent of the Solo Long-Distance Sandwich event. Of course, the UK has had a great deal of success at the several different sandwich-based events at the Olympics over recent years. For example, the UK team scored a very impressive gold medal in the Men’s 4×400 metre Cheese Salad baguette at the London Olympics. As well as the spectacular gold medal in the Women’s 100m Prawn mayonnaise in the swimming pool, breaking the Olympic record despite Tailspin suffering a somewhat soggy piece of lettuce during the final length.

It was her success in the pool at the London Olympics, which convinced Tailspin that she was capable of the endurance and the essential solo buttering experience necessary for a solo long distance attempt at a sandwich.

Of course, in the past, several people have attempted a round-the-world sandwich, but so many have failed, especially in the long passages of the Atlantic and Pacific. There, when far from dry land and without any possibility of getting fresh ingredients, they are reduced to using ingredients from bottles or jars. This can be especially fraught during storms at sea, when even opening a jar of mayonnaise in a force 9 gale is not without its dangers. This is especially so, when the boat is tossed around on rough seas, which makes spreading the butter on the bread difficult without a lifebelt or safety harness.

Of course, it was the first around the world attempt by Jack ‘Mad Jack’ Cirencester that first proved it was possible for someone to complete a solo around the world sandwich back in the late 1960s. Up until then it was considered far too dangerous for a solo attempt, especially when Mad Jack’s predecessor Pierre d’Onion Ring attempted it and had to be rescued in the middle of the South Atlantic. He was 200 miles off the Falkland Islands when his last jar of marmite washed overboard in a hurricane. Many considered him foolhardy for attempting a toasted sandwich that far from the shore. Others suggested it was the loneliness of the long-distance solo sandwich effort had driven him to the edge of madness.

However, these days, the dangers of cheese toasties and even Marmite on toast are now well understood by those willing to attempt the solo around the world sandwich.

Sandwich-making technology has also moved on apace in the intervening decades. Consequently, with today’s microchip technology there is little danger of Tailspin running out of salad stuffs until she is well past the Azores on the final leg of her homeward journey.

Therefore, despite the possibility of a freak Pacific storm wrecking her ocean-going bread bin, she has every chance of success in her endeavour.

It only remains for us all to wish her the best of luck.


Published by David Hadley

A Bloke. Occasionally points at ducks.

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