Finding the words doesn’t come easy.
Often the words are not where you left them.
You could’ve left them sleeping on the pillow next to her warm dreams. You could have left them there a long time ago, back when the times were very different to now. They could be on some foreign shore or in some alien land. The words could be lying there in a world where magic rules the air and each word could grow into a spell to tame the wildest of dragons.
The words could be anywhere, floating free in the air, behaving as the wind behaves, or left lying under some rock, or even like a sword within a stone waiting to be pulled free and spilled across the page.
There are so many places for the words to hide and it is not always easy to find them, herd them into some kind of manageable rabble and then bring them back to spill out across the whiteness of the page.
Sometimes the words get lost on the journey or fall onto the page in some new unexpected order.
Quite often – more often than not – the words end up saying what you didn’t intend them to say.
You might have a good idea of what you want to say, but the words often have other ideas. They do not want to be trapped on the page, held there forever, meaning what you want them to mean. The words have their own minds, their own meanings.
That is why the words sometimes slip from your hold. That is why the words hide away, just out of the grasp of your reaching hand.
That is why the right word is so hard to find.
They know you are looking for them. They know you want to trap them, imprison them on the page, get them to mean what you want them to mean.
The words don’t want any of that.
The words long to be free, roaming where they will, meaning what they want to mean, and saying what they want to say.
What right have you to take those words and make them your own?
You do not own the words. If you are lucky you can capture a few that will stay on the page in the way you intended.
Or close enough.
You have to learn to be satisfied with the best you are going to get.
So often, the words end up saying something you did not want them to say. The words are cunning. They can hide their true meanings from you until you see them in the cold light of the page, saying things you never intended, having meanings you did not mean.
Words are dangerous things.
That is why so many people fear them. They are afraid of what the words will reveal. Not so much about those whose words they try to censor and silence, but what those words will say about themselves.
Words can so easy speak of all we fear.
Words can say what we do not want to hear.
Sometimes finding the words is not such a good idea. Sometimes there are those who want us to remain silent and leave the words where they are hidden.