Cheese Philosophy in the Modern World

Quickpint Parallelbars is probably the UK’s leading philosopher of modern cheeses. These days he is more concerned about the role that modern cheeses play in ethics. However, he first came to philosophical fame for his work at the University of Bilston (formerly the Bilston Public Baths). Most notably, for his ground-breaking research into the conjunctionContinue reading “Cheese Philosophy in the Modern World”

Eigenvalue’s Naughty Sexy Natural Logarithms

Cosine Eigenvalue is probably the UK’s leading erotic mathematician. Her last TV series Eigenvalue’s Naughty Sexy Natural Logarithms was the season’s surprise ratings success. Nearly 100 million people apparently watched the programme in the UK alone, which is – as Eigenvalue herself points out – odd, as there are nowhere near that many people inContinue reading “Eigenvalue’s Naughty Sexy Natural Logarithms”

Bacon and the Theory of Breakfasts

Parkingspace Weaselfur is emeritus professor of Bacon Studies at the University of Port Eynon in Wales. Yesterday, he released a paper in the prestigious Journal of Inquiry into Breakfasts, claiming that without the bacon sandwich, Western civilisation would not have developed to the extent that it has. Nor would it continue to grow and developContinue reading “Bacon and the Theory of Breakfasts”

The First Lesson

Perhaps…, he thought. He tried it. Yes! There was something, definitely a tingle in the fingers. Or was it something else? RSI? Cramp? Blerg was no longer sure. He looked down at the crudely hand-printed sheet with the impressive drawings of wizards in pointy hats and robes. All wielding their staffs with sparks and lightningContinue reading “The First Lesson”

New Avenues in Everyday Eroticism

Footstool Trackevent is probably best known these days as the man most responsible for making geology sexy. He took the use of fossil and geological time periods out of the sometimes-staid world of earth science into the hot new form of erotica it has now become. After all, there cannot be many bedrooms in theContinue reading “New Avenues in Everyday Eroticism”

Something for the Weekend: Free Kindle Novel – Hanging Around Until

Hanging Around Until Free for the next five days – Available here (UK) or here (US)  [Extract] Twilight had turned to darkness outside. The Christmas decorations threw pools of coloured light into the street where litter danced in the wind. Julia shivered and cursed as the wind threw the icy drizzle into our faces. IContinue reading “Something for the Weekend: Free Kindle Novel – Hanging Around Until”

The World’s Greatest Video Game of All Time

Spindizzy Rainbowisland is, of course, the UK’s leading video game designer. His massive worldwide hit from 2008 Grand Accountancy Audit: VAT Return is one of the biggest selling computer games of all time. In addition, the game is a great critical success and marketing franchise. Based loosely on the hit film The Justice League ofContinue reading “The World’s Greatest Video Game of All Time”

Dr Chililicker’s Sexy TV Time

Obviously, it was not that simple, but these things never are. Or, at least, it was not as simple as the expert on the TV programme claimed. As we all now know, she had been doing it for years, including all that stuff with the whipped cream and the thermal underwear. However, we all oughtContinue reading “Dr Chililicker’s Sexy TV Time”

Sexual Aids and Their Drawbacks

Anyway, not that we were overly cynical about the experience, but, as you will know if you are a frequent peruser of this… whatever it is, we have had some experience with devices, products and ideas allegedly intended to enhance or improve  the sex life of the… er…. more experienced couple. We have met withContinue reading “Sexual Aids and Their Drawbacks”

A Time To Go

‘No.’ Trech turned. She glared back at him. ‘No.’ She folded her arms. ‘Why not?’ ‘It is illegal, for one.’ Trench shrugged. ‘Many things have been illegal at one time or another.’ He tugged at the hem of his sleeve; some of it came off in his hand. ‘Many things have always been illegal.’ SheContinue reading “A Time To Go”

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