A Great Revolutionary

Racecar Palindrome became a revolutionary, he later said, at the age of seven, when he first realised he was not in any way related to his valet. He claimed it was an eye-opening experience to find that his family employed people to look after them, rather than go through the tedious business of having toContinue reading “A Great Revolutionary”

Grand Uncle Stagnant and the Summer of Love

Way back in the late 1960s Grand Uncle Stagnant was at the forefront (even when he was standing at the back of the crowd, due to him being such a proudly upstanding gentleman) of the Free Love movement. So keen was Grand Uncle Stagnant on Free Love, that he immediately stopped issuing invoices as soonContinue reading “Grand Uncle Stagnant and the Summer of Love”

The Luton Budgie

Denouement Spadework was probably the UK’s leading private detective in the early post WWII period. Most of the time, of course, he worked on seedy divorces and other such bread and butter cases. Mostly just scraping by with enough left over by the end of the week for him to buy a bottle of whiskey,Continue reading “The Luton Budgie”

None of it is True

This is not going to be one of those stories about what could have been. Nor is it going to be about what ought to have been. Then again, it is not a story about what was. None of this ever happened. At least it didn’t’ happen this way… no matter what she tells you.Continue reading “None of it is True”

Domestication of the Wild Hairstylist

Back in those far off days, enormous tribes of hairstylists would sweep majestically over the wide-open plains of this ancient and noble land, often scaring the Romans and frightening the Vikings. Later, no Middle-Age city-centre was safe from the late night deprecations of these fearsome savages and many a medieval innocent shopping trolley was sacrificedContinue reading “Domestication of the Wild Hairstylist”

Never the Same

From those days on, it was never the same. How could it be? Grenil had lost everything she had ever known and so the world, and her life in it, could never be the same. At least she’d avoided the fate of the other girls and young women of her village. She’d watched from theContinue reading “Never the Same”

Lawyer Whelping Boxes

I remember it well. One day, late in the 1970s, suddenly there it was, resplendent, laid out in all its glory and slightly less florid around the edges than the advertising brochure would have you believe. Of course, I have seen many wild lawyer nests in my life up to then. But this was –Continue reading “Lawyer Whelping Boxes”

This Dread Disease

In the end, though, it had to come to this, despite the precautions everyone regarded as necessary. Self-isolation, quarantine of the infected, extra hygienic routines and antiseptic hand washes and wipes. But still the disease got through our defences. It is always the case that it only takes one case of infection to contaminate severalContinue reading “This Dread Disease”

Good News In Rural Affairs

Some good news in rural affairs, for once. At long last it seems that the Forestry Commission of Great Britain has decided that it is going to reintroduce breeding pairs of banjos back into the wild in some specially selected forests and woodland areas. It has been many years, maybe a century or more, sinceContinue reading “Good News In Rural Affairs”

Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular

Spamblock Damsongoat is now best known throughout the world as a leading proponent of… well, actually not very much in particular. With the ever-increasing amount of TV channels, websites, podcasts, e-books and other forms of media outlets, it is becoming increasingly apparent that the world is running out of people who know stuff. The worldContinue reading “Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular”

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