The Spoon in History

Still, you do not have to have had a more than average relationship with a spoon to realise just how vital a piece of technology they have become in the modern high-tech world. However, back in the days when dining etiquette demanded people eating soup must use a fork, it became apparent that cutlery hadContinue reading “The Spoon in History”

The Dick

Cleft Moraine regarded himself as an old-style traditional dick, but apart from that, he also worked as a private eye, or at least that’s what it said on his office door. Lately, though, work had been slow. These days it seemed that most people didn’t care if their wife or husband was having an affair,Continue reading “The Dick”

The Biscuit Tin Event Horizon

Earlier today, physicists announced they made some startling discoveries over the recent Christmas period, which have thrown some light upon what up to now as been regarded as one of the fundamental problems in physics. Scientists at the University of Little Frigging (formerly the cowshed) claim they have discovered proof of the theoretical concept knownContinue reading “The Biscuit Tin Event Horizon”

Retail Experience and Technological Innovation

Nowadays there aren’t that many reasons why you would need to poke an assistant supermarket manager with a jumbo packet of cod-flavoured fish-style fingers early on a Tuesday and/or Friday morning, but you never know, which is why it is always best to be prepared. That is why Tatijunk Inc. have only this week introducedContinue reading “Retail Experience and Technological Innovation”

The Anti-Fruit and Vegetable Discrimination Squad

Well, anyway, I presume you have remembered the rhubarb this time? I mean, after all the trouble we had just the other week, when the local government anti-fruit and vegetable discrimination squad raided the house claiming that certain anti-rhubarb activities had been witnessed in the area. Of course, it should be a matter of greatContinue reading “The Anti-Fruit and Vegetable Discrimination Squad”

Late-Night Philosophising

Obviously, there are very few peregrinations or perambulations of the perimeters of possibility that do end up at a place of great philosophical import. Unless, of course, we include journeys to that most profound place of philosophical pursuance, outside the fabled ancient symposium, the fish and chip shop. It has long been a tradition inContinue reading “Late-Night Philosophising”

An Interest in Cabbages

Ah… well, the cabbage…. I was rather hoping you would not notice that, or – if the worst came to the worst – you’d be too polite to mention it, but this is – after all – the interwebnets and politeness has no place here. I mean it is not that unusual to… take anContinue reading “An Interest in Cabbages”

On the Run

It was wet and cold. The rain poured down as we ran from street to street, the governmental Cheese-Detector vans hot on our trail. We had made the mistake of gathering our cell together for some rather splendid underground Stilton one of our most experienced bootleg cheese-makers had constructed, but someone left a window open.Continue reading “On the Run”

Cheese Incident

In this place, we will find the things that are here. If you remember not to place your eggcups in the vicinity of the Stock Exchange, then you can rest assured in the knowledge that your marmalade will only go towards partial fulfilment of the next cheese incident in the manifesto. All of which withoutContinue reading “Cheese Incident”

Latest Dining-Out News

There are fads and fashions in dining out as there are in many other fields of human experience. It will be interesting to see if the new trend taking off in metropolitan restaurants is just such a fad, or if it is something that will – once the fuss has died down – become aContinue reading “Latest Dining-Out News”

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