The Sentinels

We remembered these skies. It took a long time to get back to them, but we remembered the blueness of their open vistas that spread out to the horizon and the clouds floating free on the winds and breezes. So different to where we’d been. Chorla took me by the hand and led me upContinue reading “The Sentinels”

When the Dreams Don’t Let Go

Sometimes the night holds on too tight. The dreams are reluctant to let us go, they hold us there in a world we know is not our own, but we’re unable to find the route back to this world we call real. There have been dreamers lost in the night, even as the long summerContinue reading “When the Dreams Don’t Let Go”

Allotment Perversions – A Primer

For those of you who like to make use of your dibber and hoe, there is chance aplenty to get much more out of it by getting involved in allotment perversions. For those that enjoy a courgette, or – in more advanced situations – a marrow, apparently there is nothing quite like taking yourself inContinue reading “Allotment Perversions – A Primer”

Pondering a Stoat

These days, Hartlepool Disembarkation is probably best known as one of the world’s first female Stoat Ponderers. Back in those days, stoat pondering was considered very much a male occupation. As with most things in the Victorian era, women were regarded as somehow too ideal to be considered capable of pondering anything quite as enigmaticContinue reading “Pondering a Stoat”

Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures

Plankton Thermocline was one of the late 20th century’s greatest explorers. We all remember watching Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures. This series was one of the first to show the delights and wonders of the underwater world in full colour on our TVs. With his custom designed wellies, Thermocline splashed around in some of the deepestContinue reading “Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures”

(Not) The Beast From The Swamp

It begins, slowly rising out of the swamp like a lawyer at dawn. We clutch our poking sticks to our chests in trepidation as the vague shape stumbles out of the mists towards us. Then, as the features of this unknown beast resolve themselves out of the heavy mists hanging over the swamp, we realiseContinue reading “(Not) The Beast From The Swamp”

University Fees and the Perverse Arts and Sciences

There is still much talk of late about University course fees and who should pay them and how much they should be. Obviously, we at the University of Little Frigging (formerly the cow shed at Little Frigging Manor Farm) are more than keen that the students should pay as much as we can get outContinue reading “University Fees and the Perverse Arts and Sciences”

A Politics-Free World

Obviously, it is not that obvious… at least not from the most usual angles. After all, discretion is guaranteed in the adverts, and if you can’t trust the advertising industry, whom can you trust? Certainly not politicians, that is obvious from the marketing of this product. After all, who amongst us hasn’t wished there wouldContinue reading “A Politics-Free World”

Medieval Woodland Perversions

Of course, many of you may be keen to learn more about the use of woodland perversions in a historical context. Rather than disabuse you of this notion, I thought it would be far easier for all concerned if I shed a little light upon a specific period of historical interest for your edification. Therefore,Continue reading “Medieval Woodland Perversions”

It’s a Job

Sometimes there are too many alternatives, too many ways to go. Possibilities multiply upon themselves with each potential choice. Sometimes there is no best alternative and it is a choice between the least worst options. Sometimes it happens that the choice offered is really no choice at all. Rella knew all this, and still sheContinue reading “It’s a Job”

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