The Sentinels

We remembered these skies. It took a long time to get back to them, but we remembered the blueness of their open vistas that spread out to the horizon and the clouds floating free on the winds and breezes. So different to where we’d been. Chorla took me by the hand and led me upContinue reading “The Sentinels”

Pondering a Stoat

These days, Hartlepool Disembarkation is probably best known as one of the world’s first female Stoat Ponderers. Back in those days, stoat pondering was considered very much a male occupation. As with most things in the Victorian era, women were regarded as somehow too ideal to be considered capable of pondering anything quite as enigmaticContinue reading “Pondering a Stoat”

Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures

Plankton Thermocline was one of the late 20th century’s greatest explorers. We all remember watching Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures. This series was one of the first to show the delights and wonders of the underwater world in full colour on our TVs. With his custom designed wellies, Thermocline splashed around in some of the deepestContinue reading “Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures”

University Fees and the Perverse Arts and Sciences

There is still much talk of late about University course fees and who should pay them and how much they should be. Obviously, we at the University of Little Frigging (formerly the cow shed at Little Frigging Manor Farm) are more than keen that the students should pay as much as we can get outContinue reading “University Fees and the Perverse Arts and Sciences”

The Power of Numbers

Think of a number…. No, not that one… how could you? We all know the sort of mind that thinks of a number like that… don’t we? Of course, it is all well and good thinking of that particular number when you are young, and… shall we say… a bit frisky. But when you getContinue reading “The Power of Numbers”

The Care Of Recently-Hatched Lawyers

No doubt, when summer arrives your first early spring batches of Lawyer eggs will soon hatch out into tadpoles – if you are lucky. Then you will need to start to search for a swamp fetid enough for them to grow into maturity, or – at least – as close to maturity as lawyers everContinue reading “The Care Of Recently-Hatched Lawyers”

The Magic of Television

Penumbra Psychollama is the world’s leading exponent of the art of understanding just why people all around the world watch so much junk TV. She first began her studies at a very young age watching cheap mass produced made-for-TV cartoons on a children’s channel at the age of four. This she claims enabled her toContinue reading “The Magic of Television”

As I Was Saying Only the Other Day

Maybe it is not always that simple, especially when you think about all the other things there are to think about, such as…. Well, we’ll leave that to one side for the moment while we get on with whatever it was we were about to do. That is the trouble. As you get older, youContinue reading “As I Was Saying Only the Other Day”

The More Advanced Fruit-Based Sexual Perversions

We have mentioned fruit-based perversions before, but for those wishing to further their understanding of these more esoteric deviations today we are going to examine some of the more advanced fruit-based sexual perversions. Such deviations as the Loganberry Run and the Strawberry Feel are, quite evidently, more for the summer months. This is especially soContinue reading “The More Advanced Fruit-Based Sexual Perversions”

A Surfeit of the Middle Ages

Although born in the late Middle-Ages, Palfrey Surfeit became one of the most famous proto-scientists and artists of his – and all – time. Surfeit astounded the scholars of the period when he discovered that women were naked under their clothes. He also proved the moon was not actually made of the navel lint ofContinue reading “A Surfeit of the Middle Ages”

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