Jam and Scones

Ah, but we were young then and not quite as hairy in surprising places as we are now. There were times when it all seemed as though even the winters were one long endless summer and your impatience with the restrictions of underwear were not affected by sudden drops in temperatures and the prospect ofContinue reading “Jam and Scones”

Plumbing the Depths

Time was when there were things around that made it necessary to rub the upper thighs in a lascivious manner and speak of things involving baby oil and some of the more arcane sizes of tap washer. Ah, but we were young then and plumbing seemed both exotic and daring. There were times when IContinue reading “Plumbing the Depths”

The Big Laugh Theory

Still, you have to laugh, don’t you, even if it is only at the misfortunes of others. At least that way we get to feel some sort of distance from those very misfortunes. Almost as if the laughter is some charm or ritual that will prevent those same, or similar, things happening to us instead.Continue reading “The Big Laugh Theory”

The Soft Certainty of Skin against Skin

The soft certainty of skin against skin. The silent eloquence of touch that tells so much compared to the stuttering inelegance of crude words that can never get this close. The words stutter and stumble into incoherence and silence when their inadequacies are exposed by this certainty of touch. My fingers move and your bodyContinue reading “The Soft Certainty of Skin against Skin”

Chick Lit Sales Slump

Despite the apparent recent slump in the sales of chic-lit novels, Sherrytrifle Avoirdupois’ new novel Go On Shag me, I’m A Really Fit Bird, Honest goes on sale today. In this, her 23rd novel, Avoirdupois again explores her familiar Chick Lit theme of slightly chubby girls trying to get a decent bloke to hang aroundContinue reading “Chick Lit Sales Slump”

A Summer of Penguins on Trampolines

Then what? Where shall we go and what shall we do? Will you bring the trampoline, whilst I round up the penguins – first making sure there are no very small nuns hiding amongst them. After all, we all know what happened to the last bouncing nun on the trampoline in that fateful summer ofContinue reading “A Summer of Penguins on Trampolines”

Late Night Tales and Stories

You can, so easily, dance through all the moments of your days, letting the time flow past your movements like some slow languid river that eases the traveller to far distant places only ever heard of in late night tales and stories. Me? I am merely a teller of such stories. I can weave theContinue reading “Late Night Tales and Stories”

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