A Great Revolutionary

Racecar Palindrome became a revolutionary, he later said, at the age of seven, when he first realised he was not in any way related to his valet. He claimed it was an eye-opening experience to find that his family employed people to look after them, rather than go through the tedious business of having toContinue reading “A Great Revolutionary”

The Luton Budgie

Denouement Spadework was probably the UK’s leading private detective in the early post WWII period. Most of the time, of course, he worked on seedy divorces and other such bread and butter cases. Mostly just scraping by with enough left over by the end of the week for him to buy a bottle of whiskey,Continue reading “The Luton Budgie”

Them Again

Anyway… Or not. So, well… here we are then. Are you sitting comfortably? Not that I’m all that interested really. After all, I wrote this quite a while before you decided on your current seating arrangements, and I am off now doing something exciting with a bevy of nubile young research assistants on an exoticContinue reading “Them Again”

This Dread Disease

In the end, though, it had to come to this, despite the precautions everyone regarded as necessary. Self-isolation, quarantine of the infected, extra hygienic routines and antiseptic hand washes and wipes. But still the disease got through our defences. It is always the case that it only takes one case of infection to contaminate severalContinue reading “This Dread Disease”

Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular

Spamblock Damsongoat is now best known throughout the world as a leading proponent of… well, actually not very much in particular. With the ever-increasing amount of TV channels, websites, podcasts, e-books and other forms of media outlets, it is becoming increasingly apparent that the world is running out of people who know stuff. The worldContinue reading “Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular”

The Special Cupboard

But, obviously… not that one. It is best putting that one back in the special cupboard until at least your inner thigh stops throbbing so much and there is something slightly less engaging for her to watch on the TV. After all, it is the sort of thing that needs each participant’s full attention ifContinue reading “The Special Cupboard”

Secret Services

Sometimes it gets like that. But perhaps this is not the time or the place to discuss such matters, especially when they could be watching. After all, we know they are out there, don’t we? Watching our every move, recording everything we say… or do. You think that thing you do with the watermelon andContinue reading “Secret Services”

500 Words

It looked like a nice place to start. Finta looked around. It was a new blank page, not even a paragraph yet. There was a chance it could turn into an interesting story. Providing he didn’t get distracted again. She’d been here in a similar situation only a few days ago, preparing to start aContinue reading “500 Words”

The Thing with the Tongue

There was a time… No, hang on… there were a couple of times. Obviously, I am not including those other times, because there would be far too many of those to recall. Hundreds… maybe thousands of times. After all, it has been a fair few years now, and you do get the hang of itContinue reading “The Thing with the Tongue”

When it Came

It came out if the forest like a thingy coming out of the undergrowth with all its doodahs resplendent in the morning, thingamabobs glistening. ‘Oh, my gods,’ the guard on the wall screamed. ‘It’s a bloody wossname! It’s coming this way. Now!’ The captain of the guard, buckling his breastplate as he ran, clambered upContinue reading “When it Came”

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