The Luton Budgie

Denouement Spadework was probably the UK’s leading private detective in the early post WWII period. Most of the time, of course, he worked on seedy divorces and other such bread and butter cases. Mostly just scraping by with enough left over by the end of the week for him to buy a bottle of whiskey,Continue reading “The Luton Budgie”

Domestication of the Wild Hairstylist

Back in those far off days, enormous tribes of hairstylists would sweep majestically over the wide-open plains of this ancient and noble land, often scaring the Romans and frightening the Vikings. Later, no Middle-Age city-centre was safe from the late night deprecations of these fearsome savages and many a medieval innocent shopping trolley was sacrificedContinue reading “Domestication of the Wild Hairstylist”

Them Again

Anyway… Or not. So, well… here we are then. Are you sitting comfortably? Not that I’m all that interested really. After all, I wrote this quite a while before you decided on your current seating arrangements, and I am off now doing something exciting with a bevy of nubile young research assistants on an exoticContinue reading “Them Again”

Lawyer Whelping Boxes

I remember it well. One day, late in the 1970s, suddenly there it was, resplendent, laid out in all its glory and slightly less florid around the edges than the advertising brochure would have you believe. Of course, I have seen many wild lawyer nests in my life up to then. But this was –Continue reading “Lawyer Whelping Boxes”

This Dread Disease

In the end, though, it had to come to this, despite the precautions everyone regarded as necessary. Self-isolation, quarantine of the infected, extra hygienic routines and antiseptic hand washes and wipes. But still the disease got through our defences. It is always the case that it only takes one case of infection to contaminate severalContinue reading “This Dread Disease”

Good News In Rural Affairs

Some good news in rural affairs, for once. At long last it seems that the Forestry Commission of Great Britain has decided that it is going to reintroduce breeding pairs of banjos back into the wild in some specially selected forests and woodland areas. It has been many years, maybe a century or more, sinceContinue reading “Good News In Rural Affairs”

Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular

Spamblock Damsongoat is now best known throughout the world as a leading proponent of… well, actually not very much in particular. With the ever-increasing amount of TV channels, websites, podcasts, e-books and other forms of media outlets, it is becoming increasingly apparent that the world is running out of people who know stuff. The worldContinue reading “Well, Actually Not Very Much in Particular”

Juggling Balls: Episode 19

Go to Episode 1   Chapter 16   The woman from the bench came up to him. ‘Sir, are you all right, sir?’ ‘Mandy?’ Martin saw it was Mandy. She was wearing a wig and dark glasses. Martin could just make out the edges of the leather outfit she’d been almost wearing earlier, under theContinue reading “Juggling Balls: Episode 19”

Transgressions Of The Social Norms

There are times when disciplinary measures do have to be taken against certain denizens of Little Frigging who have – in some way – transgressed the social Norms, or who have not behaved in the fully upstanding way one would expect of one’s friends and acquaintances. Now, for serious transgressions of the law we –Continue reading “Transgressions Of The Social Norms”

The Special Cupboard

But, obviously… not that one. It is best putting that one back in the special cupboard until at least your inner thigh stops throbbing so much and there is something slightly less engaging for her to watch on the TV. After all, it is the sort of thing that needs each participant’s full attention ifContinue reading “The Special Cupboard”

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